Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Desperate times call for desperate measures

I've said this before and I'm sure it won't be the last time I say it but when Reese came along, any opinion or theory I had on parenting went out the window! Carson was pretty "by the book" and when it came time to potty train, he was a champ. Of course, I thought it was because of my awesome parenting skills so the Lord decided to humble me and send me Reese (maybe I'm still missing some lessons and that's why he sent Gwen?!!?). So I started off potty training Reese the same way as Carson with the "3 Day Potty Training Method." Carson took 5 days to train and he never had any regression or anything. Reese seemed so ready to train. He could communicate really well, he idolized Carson, and he had/has little man syndrome big time (meaning he thinks he's bigger than he is and he wants to do everything anyone bigger then him can do).  I honestly though he'd be out of diapers in a few days. Boy was I wrong!!!

The first week went well. He was having fun with it and getting lots of attention but once it lost it's newness, he stopped caring and just went wherever, whenever. We tried keeping it up but decided that maybe he really wasn't ready so we put him back in diapers. We went through a pack of diapers and tried potty training again. Nope, no luck. So back in diapers. And this was seriously the last time I was going to buy diapers for this kid so we decided to try other tactics. We tried everything that everyone else has had success with. Bribing, potty charts, rewards, toys, attention (positive and negative), candy, treats, stickers, a special potty training watch with an alarm, pull-ups, even a fish! We went through everyone he knew and told them that they all go potty in the toilet, we let him watch us, we showed him how Superman has special undies and keeps them dry and bought special underwear for him. Then we got even more desperate and resorted to time outs and cold showers. This was over the course of several months. Finally, we gave up and just let him have accident after accident hoping that he would realize that this was the new way of life. He was having at least four accidents a day. Mind you, we were living in Moscow with no washer and dryer. Rarely would he have success. After a solid YEAR of potty training, I gave up. I couldn't handle it anymore. I was so sick of cleaning up _ _ _ _!!! Literally! I had told myself that there was no reason why a 2 year old couldn't be potty trained, I thought that if you were buying size 5 diapers then that kid is definitely big enough to be potty trained. I felt like a fool walking up to the cashier to buy size freaking 6 diapers. 

At this point, I was done. I gave up. No more talking about potty training, no more taking him to the bathroom because it's "time", it was over. No more pressure! For me or him. I had no idea when he would be potty trained and I pretty much didn't care anymore. I figured when Gwen was ready I try it again with Reese. But then Ryan got creative.

One night Ryan got the idea to scare the crap of him. He said, "What if we just got really mad at him and scared him really bad." No way! I'm already the bad guy! "Well, what if there was a monster that scared him?" Well, if that's what you want to do, I'm handing over the reigns. So he called Reese over and told him that other mommies and daddies in the area have called to tell us there's a potty monster in town and if you have an accident then he'll come to our house and scare us. At first, Reese didn't seem to really understand but then he kept asking questions and you could see the wheels turning. So the next couple of days went really well. But then he had to test his boundaries again. He had two accidents and I can't remember for sure but I think it was when he was at someone else's house. So when we got home that night, we told him that we were really scared because he had accidents so the potty monster was going to come. I don't think he really believed us yet.

So after we got ready for bed, I was tucking the boys in when Ryan went and got ready. He put on a Halloween wig and got a blanket we hardly used and while hunched over, he started making these weird snorting and grunting noises. I  have to admit that I was even kinda scared! But the second Reese heard those noises he immediately pulled the covers over his head and started whimpering. There wasn't even a need for a costume and I'm sure his imagination came up with an ever scarier monster but the effect worked! The potty monster made his way into the boys' bathroom and flushed the toilet then Ryan came running in, "Was that the potty monster? I think he just went down the toilet. That was so scary and I hope he doesn't come back again!" I was sure that Reese would be up the rest of the night with nightmares but he was fine. Slept through the night.

The next day he started asking questions about the potty monster. We had his attention and he was starting to care whether or not his undies were dry. He kept saying that if he went in his undies that the monster would get him but we made it clear that he wasn't going to get him, just come and scare him. But he was out of practice and had another accident. So that night the potty monster came again. Reese reacted the same way. The potty monster has only had to come twice and I'm pretty sure he's 99% trained at this point.

Reese talks about the monster on a daily basis. The other day he was doing the dance during dinner so we asked him if he needed to go and he denied that he did. We asked him if the monster was going to come tonight and his eyes got really huge and then he just started crying and then ran to the bathroom. Let me tell you- that was the funniest and saddest thing I've ever seen!  I couldn't help but laugh at his reaction but I felt horrible and I just wanted to cuddle him and tell him that there wasn't a monster. He gets it now though. He cares when he's wet and dry and that alone is a huge improvement. He's doing really well now and whenever he mentions the monster we tell him that as long as he keeps his undies dry and clean, the monster is dead. I guess you just have to get creative as a parent and this one goes to Ryan!

So our method of training?... Literally scaring the crap out of him, but making it to the toilet! And if you've read this whole thing, congratulations, but please don't send us to child protective services.

6 comments:

Natalie said...

Oh man that is hilarious! Whatever it takes. No judgment here. My kids are rarely by the book so we have to get creative too. He'll laugh about it someday right?

Melissa said...

None of my kids are 100% so no judgements here.

Becca Bingham said...

That is hilarious! I love it! Rob is the one that came up with the idea that helped Kaitlynn stick it through. Thank goodness for husbands and their input into parenting. I can only imagine that this story will be retold many times over when he is older.

Kyle and Emily Stott said...

Haha you guys win for creativity! That's hilarious!

Tiffany Giraud said...

I love it

Tiffany Giraud said...

Oops, didn't finish. This is such a fun story to read, and very inspiring, way to think outside the box! This is the perfect story to tell his girlfriends one day. :)